Glee

Last night, I introduced my mom to the magic of Glee. We listened to a bunch of songs with Iriff and Aimee in Aimee's room. Mom said Dr. Perril listens to Glee at work, which she finds odd since its a tv show. She probably thinks its sort of like High School Musical. I showed her videos on Hulu and she really liked the songs that I have to burn her a CD to use in the car.

I enjoy these moments because lately whenever I look at my mom she looks so worried about me. Apparently, I have no direction. My uncle came to visit and he told me about my cousin at UC Davis (she's also '11) and how she's applying to law school at Brown and Harvard. Okay, so I'm not sure my uncle knows there is no law program at Brown, but at least my cousin knows what she wants. My grandma was talking to my mom and dad about not worrying so much about me because I'll be successful like my mom and be a doctor since I have no boyfriend. My dad looked at her and told her not to be naive. Yes, my grandma doesn't know I have a boyfriend. Its such a hush-hush secret. No one talks about me having a boyfriend. My mom occasionally refers to Matthew when I wake up late in the morning and she says I stay up too late on the phone or chatting or something with Matthew. When I told her I wasn't sure what I wanted to do after college, she asked me what Matthew wanted to do. My dad doesn't even mention Matthew's name although he makes snide comments that may minamahal ako na iba hindi pamilya ko.

Anyway, my rant today is just about how I'm feeling the pressures since I'm going to graduate in 1.5 years. No one besides my parents and sisters knows I'm taking a year off and I'm expecting everyone at the next family party to ask me questions about how is MCAT studying and if I'm applying to Harvard or Johns Hopkins for med school or something. I've started practicing my quiet smile for these questions to make it seem like I'm just being modest about it all since I'm too scared to tell them I don't know. Med school isn't out of the picture its just in the background. For some reason, my mom also keeps bringing out how I might be getting married to Matthew right out of college, which is random to me, but if I were a mom it might worry me too.

Oh, Matthew. Why are things so difficult? Despite it all, I'm glad I have you with me throughout everything. I miss you. Can't you accidentally be in Hawaii at the same time I am?